I confess. Not all lies appear to be nasty little critters. Some of them are my friends.
Honestly, I love self-pity. Makes me feel special. Noble. Loved.
Unfortunately, she’s nothing but a lie.
A lie that fooled me again today.
It started with a work out at the gym.
“No towel. No entrance,” I was told at the door after a long sweltering walk through the resort.
By this time
- the burning desert of sunburn across my sunburned shoulders ached.
- sweat ran in not so itty bitty waterfalls down my back.
“Totally unfair,” I wanted to yell in Spanish. Since, I was only fluent in two words –
That didn’t happen. The translation “crazy cockroach” just wouldn’t would get my point across.
So, I turned around and headed back. On the way, I grumbled about towels and what’s the big deal and why would anyone want to make a human being suffer this way?
As I approached my stucco building, I noticed
- a maid buzzing in and out of rooms as she changed sheets and cleaned toilets.
- a man in white spraying down the wide, stone walkway in front of me.
- a grounds keeper trimming the grass.
- another employee carrying drinks to all the various suite’s fridges.
Suddenly, my why’s seemed more than a little
A few days ago I flew in from a country where clean water is taken for granted. Indoor plumbing, public transportation and emergency services are considered an inalienable right of each citizen.
Until severe illness or tragedy strikes. folks like me don’t often come to terms with real suffering.
Suffering has a way of revealing lies.
And the truth.
Here’s one -Possessions have little value without relationship.
As for my towel situation,
- I grabbed my beach towel from the room.
- Told self pity to take a hike.
- Caught the trolley to the fitness center.
- Worked out.
- Walked through the heat to the room and made sure our maid got a big tip.
- Took a moment to stop and pray.
I asked God to take a good look into my heart. To check for more selfishness. Anger. Arrogance. Who knows what else He’ll find?
Then, I thought of the Psalm 139, a psalm that expresses what I cannot express on my own,
“Search me, God,”songwriter penned in ancient script, “ and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.”
My life. Nothing spectacular. Living and learning. That’s what it’s all about.