Sorry Forrest Gump–Sometimes life is NOT a box of chocolates. We just need to grow up.



I was in my early twenties.

  • A Bible College student.
  • Starry-eyed with dreams of being a missionary or children’s pastor.

The leaders at the school seemed like superheroes to me. I was in awe.

Then came Valentine’s day.

“Hey,” someone yelled during break time, “Valentine’s candy.”

Couldn’t pass that up. I loved sweets. But, I didn’t have a boyfriend to buy me any. I had no way to get to town.

So, I ran outside and joined the students jostling around a fancy oversized box of chocolates. After agonizing over which one to choose, I grabbed a nut filled blob and walked over to my friends.

“Isn’t this great?” I said.

My friends just stared at me. Then, one by one, they tossed their chocolates in a nearby pond.

“Throw yours in too,” they demanded.

I refused.

“We know who the candy is really for,” one of them announced. Her explanation was not pleasant.

One of my class mates had received this very box of candy from

  • a Christian leader.
  • a married man.
  • Someone I respected very much.

Earlier, this young woman had shown my friends the accompanying card. The leader’s signature scrawled on a sticky note inside.

Was it true?

To this day, I am not certain. But, I had heard things in the month previous. I had seen situations involving the leader and this young lady that seemed a bit odd. Up to this point I ignored my suspicions. Hoped I was just imagining things.

Not long after that Valentine’s Day, it became public. The inappropriate behavior of this leader.

People were stunned. Some even devastated.

To many of them , this guy had not only been their leader, he had been their

  1. Conscience.
  2. Emotional road map.
  3. High priest to God Himself.


I was one of the devastated ones.

It took a while for me to recover. To take responsibility. Not for the leader’s mess, but for my own reaction. I had to face what I had done –

  • Shut my brain off upon coming to Bible College.
  • Abdicated the responsibility of my spiritual growth to another human being.

Not a good thing to do.

God gave us the intellect to question. The spiritual ability to discern.

Bottom line – We Christians need to grow up. Grasp truth for ourselves. Understand it. Use it wisely to

  1. make important decisions.
  2. support leaders with integrity and wisdom.

Be assured, a godly leader will not feel threatened we take responsibility for our own spiritual lives. He will rejoice that his followers are finally growing up.

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