Shepherd Love and Shattered Glass

“If God really knew me He would not love me,” someone said recently. I tossed out a few platitudes like “God loves everybody” and “God is love”. Yeah, I know, those tidbits of wisdom had as much satisfaction as sucking the salt off  of popcorn kernels at the bottom of the microwave bag.  I do love leftover popcorn. But this was not a time philosophical junk food.

This was a time for unrefined truth.

Fact is, God sees past our I’m-ok-you’re-ok social posturing crap into the deep yearnings of our soul. And, He’s not grossed out, disgusted, or demanding we just go away.

Au contraire, my friend. (always wanted to say that.)

Thing is, sometimes even the truth can seem like those greasy popcorn platitudes. We need more than words. That is why God shows us over and over in everyday life how much He loves us.

Example-tiny human beings.

God teaches us so much truth through little children, I’m surprised that they don’t  have ISBN numbers tattooed onto their bottoms.

Speaking of babies-it’s been over a month since my grandbaby Shepherd made his dramatic appearance.

Yes, I am a grandma. Just to blow your mind let me throw in this stick of dynamite- I have another grandbaby. His name is Ezekiel. He rules England with one little wiggle of his chubby finger. Even in our long distance relationship, he has my full attention.

IMG_0054
when Ezekiel was a tiny baby

Then, Shepherd came. Before his arrival I

  • hand stitched on a quilt- (and I can barely thread a needle)
  • bought ittsy-bitsy clothes and cutesy toys
  • got up before 5 am and flew all the way across the USA
  • barely got used to the midwest before I crawled out of bed before the sun and raced to the hospital

It was worth it all-I was so glad and excited  just to be there when he was born.

holding baby shepherd
baby Shepherd’s first day

Likewise with Shepherd?

Not so much.

No hello, ‘thanks for coming’. No ‘hey,I like the quilt’ or ‘wow, those clothes are really cool’.

Basically, he spits up, dirties his diaper and occasionally pees on his parents.

Not exactly a favored contender for the Nobel peace prize.

Shocker announcement- his parents cannot get enough of this kid. Neither can his grandparents. It’s the same as my first grandson- “Is he wet?” “Is he hungry?”Did he just smile?”

Facebook is like some kind of hall of fame- picture after picture of this kid. And I look at each and every one. Between gazing at Shepherd and Ezekiel’s pictures I barely have time  for anything else.  What do people do with more grandkids? Lock themselves in a room with two years of take-0ut and adult diapers so that they can gaze at grandkids 24 hours a day?

Seriously, I still have a job, a house full of people and other stuff in my life. But, I drop it all the minute I can be with/skype or look at a picture of one of my grandkids.

Why the love? The passion? The constant concern for a life form that needs total care all the time and has nothing to give?

It’s a God thing, left over from the Garden of Eden- bits and pieces of a connection once so deep there was nothing  but total trust, commitment and compassion. All that remains on this side of heaven is a reflected glory. We find it in the love of a father. A mother. That glimmer of God’s unfailing compassion and grace reflecting off the shattered glass of our souls.

When I see my grandsons on Skype, Facebook, Lifecake or Whatsapp I think about how much I love them and how much God loves me. He cares for each and every one of us  more than any loving parent or grandparent on earth.

Unfailing love.

God’s love.

Oh, and welcome to the world baby Shepherd boy!!!

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